June 23, 2010

Ottawa Rocked My World

So here’s a fun little story. I took the time on my first day off in Ottawa to go and see the Canada Science and Technology Museum. I thought it sounded kinda fun and geeky, so why the hell not? I get there around 2pm and get a brief guide as to what to see and where to go.

“Oh we have a great attraction featuring automotives around the corner,” yeah, I’m not really a car guy.

“And our main attraction is our “Crazy Kitchen” which is located at the back of the hall,” really? A kitchen is a part of “science”?

“Just go past the displays of the boats and trains and you can’t--“ WHAT?!? YOU HAVE TRAINS HERE?!?

I motored down past the cars to the trains. But on my way down, I noticed the boat display too. They had hardcore details of some of the biggest and best ocean liners ever built, going all the way back to ships that still used humongous sails instead of steam engines. And yes…there was a big honkin’ display for the Titanic.

And then I turned the corner and saw my first train display. They. Were. HUGE! The wheels alone towered over me, a few you could actually go up on and sit in the engineers chair. Well, you’re not supposed to, but fuck it, when am I gonna be back here?

And as I came down the stairs, looking through the windows of the travel cars with authentic cots and washrooms displayed, I heard a rumble.

It was similar to being underneath a bridge when a train passes overhead. It shook the foundations of the building and I felt my knees clunk together once or twice. I thought, “Holy shit! Now THAT is a dedicated soundtrack!” It put 5.1 surround sound to shame.

Then as I am walking past the display, I noticed a lot of the tour guides going up to everyone asking if they were okay. And some of them kept saying, “That was a big one!”

“A big what,” I asked?

“That was an earthquake!”


Soooo, I just experienced my first earthquake.

The guy made me feel slightly stupid for thinking it was part of the display by saying, “Uh, yeah…when the entire building shakes, it’s not a display!”

Well fuck you dude! I’m from Winnipeg! The ground tends to like us, and doesn’t bounce us around just for the fun of it! And by the way…OXY PADS, look into it!

I wish there was something else to write to make this story my usual length. But I don’t know how to top an earthquake.

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